(no subject)

[columella]

Should be in bed.  Had a good weekend, although it started out rocky.  My mother called on friday morning after spending the 3 previous days not returning calls and telling Hospice not to tell me anything about what was being done with my brothers body or plans for a funeral.  Then she calls as I am packing to leave for an SCA event for the weekend that I am in charge of registration for.  And do her usual job on me.  Tells me she is doing a memorial service the next day.  When I say I am sorry but I can not be there (too late to get someone else to do registration at that point) I get "I am not surprised, you were not there when he was alive, why you would be when he is dead."  Thanks mom, love you too.

I swear, when this is done I am not having anything else to do with her.  I am not interested in being used as a weapon like she did my brother.

The Obit was in the paper while I was gone.  Since the link to the St. Pete. Times does not seem to work very well (some kind of script error) I will just copy it here:

Louis E. Palazzo
Palazzo, Louis E. July 24, 1969-Aug. 28, 2007 38, passed away Tuesday, Aug. 28, after a courageous battle with cancer. He was born in Port Jefferson, NY. Lou lived in Holiday, and was an incredible father, partner, son, and friend to all who were fortunate enough to have known him. Lou spent his life being a caregiver for others. Lou was passionate about fishing, boating and #1 Savannah. He is survived by the loves of his life, Kellie Munda, and their daughter, Savannah Aliese Palazzo, 18- months old. Lou is also survived by his mother, Pamela Klein; grandmother, Fidelis Allcorn; father, Anthony Palazzo; and 2 sisters, Debbie Pettingill, and Susan Carter, along with many beloved aunts, uncles and cousins. Special thanks to Tari Gordon, Dave Kornacki, and Jill Rippel for going above & beyond for Lou and his family. Donations can be made to the Savannah Palazzo Trust Fund, 531 Sunset Dr., Trafford, PA 15085.

I am sure my mom wrote it.  "nuff said.

Comments

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

So sorry things had to go this way. Hang tough.

[joeguppy.livejournal.com]

You're REAL family love you.

[gilmoure.livejournal.com]

Whose real family?

[morrisman.livejournal.com]

I understand, Deb. After my Dad passed a year and a half ago, my stepmom started becoming psycho about Dad... just couldn't let things rest with my Dad, and started trying to smear his name after he treated her so well. But my siblings and I got through it by being secure in knowing that we knew the truth, and that she can't change that.

Big hugs...

[raphaela.livejournal.com]

My condolences and many, many hugs.

[flaming-mo.livejournal.com]

Isn't it amazing how a death brings out the best in people? LOL

After everything that happened with my mother, my grandparents, and of course more recent losses, I don't think any kind of bad behavior would faze me. Unfortunately I had to make a choice similar to yours concerning my mother's family.

Good luck, and hopefully you won't have too much more B.S. to deal with before moving on with your life.

[peacockharpy.livejournal.com]

That obituary is.... nah, I can't say it.

*hugs*

On a completely unrelated note: your grandmother's name is Fidelis? That is all kinds of awesome!

[selyrabbit.livejournal.com]

All I can say is hugs and I appreciate you and all you do.

Bu11sh1t!

[tlh-in-tlh.livejournal.com]

"I am not surprised,...dead." You know that's not true in any meaningful way, don't you? You were an example of strength and patience far beyond what many others have managed, and an example of setting boundaries. Those are both very necessary.
Hugs to you and yours!

[g-allen.livejournal.com]

I am reminded of this.

http://blackfish.biz/allen/?p=24

Your mom cannot comprehend, she will never change.

But when she said that "you had never been there for your brother," she is wrong on so many points... and she is correct on one.

You were not supposed to be there for your brother, you were not obligated to stop him from using drugs, to make good choices and you could not force him to change his life.

Your mom could have and did not.

Who was not there for whom?

Love you!